Babysitter blues

We got a babysitter tonight so James and I could go on a date. Yippee! Grace flipped out and couldn't handle the separation, come to find out it was our babysitter's first time babysitting. LOL  No Date. We didn't even make it out the door. We stayed for 45 mins to try and calm Grace down but she knew we where planning on leaving her and she didn't feel comfortable. She cried the whole time. So finally James called the date off. Needless to say we're babysitting our babysitter til her parents get home because she can't get into their house and no one is home. Oh and she doesn't know her Mom's cell phone number. Note to self teach my kids my cell phone number before they turn 12.

At first I was upset.  I wanted a date, I got the babysitter, I did all the work and now it's not going to happen.  It was a little disappointing.  Then I was frustrated, I figured I'd drop off the babysitter and our night would be like any other night, but that didn't work out.  I felt like crying, but crying over spilled milk is pointless so I started to internalize our situation.  

I told myself all is good.  And then I started to believe it.  I knew it was best that we stayed home with Grace she's a tender spirit that Grace and she needs to know she is safe. It's my job as her parent to make sure she feels safe even if that mean no date nights. On the bright side both girls will be in bed soon and James and I can have some snuggle time at home. 

So once I came to the conclusion that it was okay that we stayed home I started to feel bad for the babysitter.  It was obviously very disappointing for her.  She came into the night with excitement and optimism.  She even had her babysitting bag of goodies.  One look at Grace and she shut down.  She wasn't sure what to do or how to handle the situation.  Poor thing.  And I didn't feel comfortable leaving her with a crying child when she felt so out of place.  Staying home was the right thing to do.  

Sarah Day said it perfectly "I think you showed her an excellent example of caring parents, I'm sure she learned more about parenting tonight than she will in all her future years babysitting. Maybe she was very nervous and grace picked up on it, children are so perceptive. Be glad you are that memory!

That's when i realized I wanted to keep this memory.  I wanted to Grace to know that we love her.  That her feeling of safety is important to us and that i could be proud of this difficult situation.