The Girls Ballet Recital

The girls did a wonderful performance this afternoon.  

my favorite parts

Watching Gwenevere help Grace up

Watching Grace spin around so fast

Watching Gwenevere do little leaps

Feelings

I'm feeling disappointed in myself today.

Mostly because I can't do everything I want.  and sometimes that's hard to accept.

Everett kisses

The girls where playing nicely together like normal.  I was holding Everett when the two girls walked by me.  I had to stop them right then and there.  I gave them each and kiss and told them I loved them.  It always makes me happy to see them playing so nicely.  After kisses they two girls took off to go play some more.  Everett watching everything turned to me, grabbed my face and gave me a big kiss on my cheek.  It was so sweet.  I kiss him all the time and for the most part he doesn't mind.  But when he gave me a kiss, I knew he knew exactly want it meant.

Everett age 14 months

Flash back to dating

I volunteered at the Stake Festival of Nativities this evening.  When I got home everyone was in bed.  Hurry I get a moment to myself.
I sat dawn and browsed through facebook, then I started to get tired, but James was asleep with the girls and I didn't want to wake up Everett trying to cuddle with him.
Now I'm lonely.  lol
A few minutes to myself and I'm not sure what to do.  I thought to myself "what would I do if where single".  "I don't know, I wasn't single for long, I guess that's because I don't like to be along".  hahahahha  Thinking this all to myself I found it quite hilarious.

Before James and I where dating, a group of friends decided to get together and watch a movie one Monday night after FHE.  I had school in the morning so I decided to just go home.  James had work in the morning so he left the group early to go home as well.  Once I got home I realized how lonely I was, knowing James was at home too, I called him up.  "I'm scared."  I said.  And somehow that was enough to get him to come over.  We stayed up till 3 am in the morning cuddling just the two of us.

Gwenevere's prayer

Today Gwenevere sang Primary songs the entire time we ran errands.  It was lovely.  In between songs she would share little tid bits of what she was feeling.

"I love this song (speaking about I am like a star shining brightly) I want to sing it to my whole entire class so they can learn it too.

"I wish everyday was Sunday."  I told Gwenevere that we could pray everyday and read our scriptures everyday and be kind to others everyday and that way we'd be worshiping Jesus everyday just like we go to Church to worship Jesus.  

Tonight while saying her nighttime prayers Gwenevere said

"... Thank you for this wonderful day.  Thank you for our scriptures, and family and church.  Thank you for our Bishop and for tithing."   

It was beautiful to hear her Testimony.  I know she is starting to feel the happiness that come from living the gospel of Jesus Christ.

My Health

Rebecca (my sister in law)  started using a workout program called  Beach Body and loves it.  She loves it so much that she decided to be a life coach and help others find their passion for working out.  I really do love to work out, but lately  it's been really hard to find the time and routine that works for me.  So when Rebecca invited me to join her online workout group I was hesitant and excited at the same time.

On day 4 of our group Rebecca Baertlein posted this: "Finding the WHY. We all had a reason we decided to take this step in bettering our heath. If we focus on WHY we took this step we are able to have more focus on our goals throughout this journey. What is your WHY?" 

Today (two weeks in) I finally wrote my response
I've enjoyed reading other peoples responses and have thought a lot about my why not really feeling a strong reason. Yes I want to be healthy for myself, and for my family, yes I want to enjoy all the good things in life, I want to be active when I'm older and forming good habits early is important for that, but none of that felt like my true "Why". 
Last night I was feeling really discouraged. I've dreaded doing my workout everyday this entire time. That is very disappointing. I've loved this group, and the eating healthy part, I've seriously improved my mind set which is great but I have not had a "wow that was a great workout" Since my first day. Instead working out has felt like pulling teeth lately. I thought maybe it's my workouts? Maybe if I found the right workout I'd enjoy it more, 
So I tried Hip Hop Abs which I really loved a few years ago prior to having kids, but that wasn't anything special, I felt like a waste of time. I tried Turbo Jam since I love to dance and figured this would be a good active workout. But still I felt incomplete after working out, so I've also been doing some Charlene Extreme because I really enjoy lifting weights, however I don't feel comfortable with her method. 
So last night after working out and feeling very disappointed and discourage, my WHY came to me. 
I work out because I LOVE to work out. I've never been good at motivating myself to do something I don't love. So I thought back on my past and looked back at the times I was the most active and healthiest. Each time frame consisted of my getting out of my house to exercise, weather it was riding my bike, running, swimming, taking an aerobics class or working out at the gym. 
I guess I'm a get out of the house and go kind of girl, So putting off errands in the morning so I can do my workout just isn't my thing. And waiting til the kids are in bed is to tiring. No matter how effective or popular the workout is I need to love it in order to be successful. 
This has been so good for me to realize. With three little kids all at home, my time is very limited, and my health is often put on the back burner. At this time in my life i justify not working out because my health isn't really an issue, but someday my health will be a big issue if I don't do something for myself right now. 
I've dreaded purchasing a gym membership since I'd also need to get day care and that would be so expensive. However knowing now that I will probably never enjoy the "stay at home to work out", it's time to re-prioritize and get myself out of the house to workout. I found two somewhat affordable gyms close to my home, which I'll need to look into. Or I've really been interested in doing yoga lately so maybe i'll look into getting a punch pass at a yoga studio. I think this is going to be the right move more me. For I dearly love to workout.

It's good for me to realize what I need.  In the past I've worked out at the stake center but now that Everett is walking I've had a hard time going since there is no one to watch him and it's the same as working out at home.  

I'm going to try and brainstorm ideas to work out at the stake center so that I don't need a membership but I'm also going to look into getting a membership with the discount James gets from his insurance.  Wish me luck on this adventure.  

Sleeping Everett

Everett has been my best sleeper so far.  He lets me know when he's tired, and he sleeps when he needs to.

 Since we had co-slept for the past year, i was i bit nervous.  I was afraid i'd be going up and down the stairs several times each night and getting less sleep than before.  Since we've made the transition Everett only wakes up once a night usually around 3 am.  I go up stairs and comfort him, it's really not that long of journey like I had envisioned.

Last night I had a Relief Society meeting so James put the kids to bed when I got home James told me that he was with Everett putting him to sleep but the girls where being too noisy so he left Everett awake in bed while he went to tend to the girls.  When he got back Everett was fast asleep.  This made me so excited. The future is looking bright.

Everett woke up around 10 pm right before James and I went to bed.  I put him back to sleep and went down stairs.  At 3 am I woke up but it wasn't because of Everett, Grace was coming down stair to cuddle we haven't had an kid in our bed for about a month so that was kind of a surprise.  Then at 5:30 when I woke up for the day, I realized that Everett never woke up.  Yippee!

Someday in the future I will sleep through the entire night again, that future is looking a little closer today.

Gwenevere has great taste in men

James eating a chocolate stick
Gwenevere: It looks like you are smoking
Papa: That's not good
Gwenevere: yeah, once I saw an attractive guy smoking.
James surprised that he daughter is noticed an attractive guy
Papa: What made him handsome?
Gwenevere: He looked like the guy in the movie with a magical carousel and dancing on roofs.

hahahaha Gwenevere thinks Dick Van Dyke is attractive.

Thanksgiving festivities: grateful for friendships.

This past Thanksgiving we where invited to a friends house for dinner.  It was wonderful.  It was low key, stress free very simple and elegant.  I truly enjoyed our evening with friends.  I especially liked not being the one who cooked the Turkey.  Jason did that and it turned out amazing.  

This is the Turkey I did, I thought of it, James did most of the  vegetable  cutting.

The table was big enough for all of us to sit around it.  It was so nice.  Even Everett had a seat at the table. We even had placement name cards decorated by Kyler and Logan.  

After dinner we watched the Sea hawks game and bounced around on Papas.

Everett had to get in on the action

His favorite part was falling over

Logan and his amazing assistants  

Kyler and Gwenevere up at the same time, very impressive 

 After the game, we got ready for bed,  yes we had a sleepover party.  It was awesome.  I stayed with the kids so that black Friday shopping could happen in the wee hours of the morning.  James had work the next day so he helped tuck kids into bed then headed home so he could go to work the next morning.  

The next morning we ate yummy waffles for Breakfast and hung around in our PJs till it was Everett's morning nap.  Then it was time to say goodbye.  The kids had so much fun.  You know you have awesome friends when driving 20 minutes across town to have a family sleep over party feel just like visiting family a state away (minus the 12 hour drive).  It was wonderful.  

Which brings me to an area of thought I've been meaning to write about for some time.

Over the past year the Lord has lovingly shown me the beauty of eternal friendship.  I have some many wonderful inspirational friends that I've been hesitant to write about them since I'm sure I'll be forgetting someone very special.  But I have to get over the fact that this post will be imperfect and hopefully be able to express my gratitude for my friends in a way that is pleasing to God. 

wow where do I begin?

I'm grateful for friends who uplift and inspire me.  Never before have I been encompass by some many influences of good.  One day I was down on myself I read a facebook message about how evil the world has become.  I took a moment to think about it and the Lord quickly flooded my heart with overwhelming feelings of all the good that is around me. And my mind was reminded of many of my friends.   A quote that hangs in my daughters bedroom came to mind, "The future is as bright as your faith."  President Thomas S. Monson  

While we where moving into our new house my friend Jill reached out and helped out above and beyond the role of friends.  She brought her children over several days in a row to help me paint the entire inside of my house.  Day after day our kids played in the front yard while we worked together to paint.  There is no way James and I could have done it alone.  But even more impressive was that fact that her selfless service and sacrifice came just a few months after loosing her baby girl.  The heart ache and pain a parent feels when their child dies is describable.  I can't help but feel the love of the savior in my friends selfless act.  In times of need and service she was the one who reached out and serviced far beyond my ability.   Jill has also helped me learn to sew curtains and can pears.  Her talents are endless and her ability to teach is never ending.  

Jill was not the only friend who saved the day,  Vangie came over to help paint, she watched my kids, and their family helped us move that day.  This is a big deal.  Never had a felt so helpless and overwhelmed before, but because I the amazing friends I have the Lord took care of my needs.

Sarah Day, voluntarily  asked to come help me clean my house the night before the big move.  Months of renovations can leave a level of dust and dirt on EVERYTHING.  We where barely making it to have all the major renovations done in time, let along have time to clean.  Sarah's help in ways that only my heart can truly account for.  There is nothing better than having a friend left you up when you are week and make you feel clean, and beautiful, physically and spiritually.

When I think of my dear friends, Tanya is one of the first on my lists.  Wow what an amazing lady.  Her and her husband work so well together and strive to live the gospel word perfect.  It's fun to look back on life and see how the Lord has guided you.  Tanya is by far one of my most favorite.  She gave me the courage to start preschool, she takes care of her home in ways I still struggle with and strive to improve.  She is calm and easy going and I feel like she is my sister.  She is one that sees you in your weakest moment and still encourages you to become more.  Or in Tanya's cause, walk with you while you are in labor and never once call me crazy for doing a home birth.  

Once while living in Hawaii I was overwhelmed with the idea of Gestational Diabetes.  A sweet friend knowing the path I was on went above and beyond buying groceries for me that I could eat that lasted for a month.  Never will I forget her love and beauty.  

This past year I met a new friend who is incredible.  Amara and i meet at the ymca, we visited while our girls took swim lessons together.  The light of Christ shines purely in her soul and she uplifts and inspires me every time I see her. I think she's going to be a key friend to help me get back into the social work field someday.

I love that I have neighbors who are friendly but more than friendly they reached out and now we are good friends.  Cassie Field, Rachelle Patty and Emily Boyle just to name a few.  Last night I called one of them up to ask for 2 cups of Chocolate Chips so I could make pumpkin cookies.  I don't need to give them cash for the chips, we'll exchange other ingredients in the future. As well as babysitting, tools, and anything else you can think of.

And then there is Esther who makes living simple and wanting less beautiful.  She's always finding the best solutions to my want list.  She's creative and fun, and doesn't mind just hanging out at the park everyday of the week.  I can't wait til next summer comes.  

Laurel is a new friend, we met through a preschool play group.  I love her wisdom, her beauty  and smile.  Laurel is close to the spirit and has taught me so much about listening to the prompting and acting on them.  She is the one who inspired me to have the courage to write this blog post.  We where talking about the spirit and I was telling her how I felt when I had a specific prompting a few months ago but now how I doubt that prompting.  She shared with me how I can hear a prompting and even act on it, but still loose faith.  That is why we should keep a record.  That we may recall those feelings and prompting regularly.  The more we listen to the spirit the more the spirit will communicate with us.  The more knowledge we can gain.  

I can't forget my friendships with my siblings.  This summer I had the oppurutity to spend time with everyone of my sibblings.  I learned different things for each one of them.

Tessha- Friendship matters and we do a poopy job staying intouch as a family.  
Luke-    Righteous leadership is all that I will ever allow in my home.  You cannot teach someone who isn't willing to learn, you just have to love them.
Will-  Sometimes just a quite presence is all that is needed.  He also is an incredible example of a loving husband.  He and His wife although they do not meet traditional marriage roles show a clear example of what Heavenly Father desires for all marriages.  With all the hype about the ruining of the traditional marriage I'm so happy to see that Marriage is more than just a male and a female, (although I do like that) It's about making a complete union, helping you and your partner feel whole.  Mother are not just stay and home cooks and Fathers are not just money makers.  Okay off my soupbox.  Thank you Will and Jenni for letting me see your beautiful marriage.
Kristi-  Said it perfectly while I was visiting with her.  We are poor but are enjoying the journey.  Yes my husband could have slaved day and night and finished he degree sooner but the years of him being at home with our children will never be forgotten.  It's not about who we become it's about the choices we make along the way.  
Laura-  Has always been there for me, she is my rock when I waiver.  She is smart with her finances and has been a key player in helping me learn more.
Seth-  If ever I have a question about the gospel he is the one I ask for help to understand.
Grace- I trust in the Lord I know i'll be okay
alisha-  My body is important and it's worth taking care of.

Oh the list goes on and on.  This is just a small part of what I felt that day when gratitude for friendship flooding my mind.     Yes there is evil but there is also a lot of good.     I am thankful for all that is good.  

Babysitter blues

We got a babysitter tonight so James and I could go on a date. Yippee! Grace flipped out and couldn't handle the separation, come to find out it was our babysitter's first time babysitting. LOL  No Date. We didn't even make it out the door. We stayed for 45 mins to try and calm Grace down but she knew we where planning on leaving her and she didn't feel comfortable. She cried the whole time. So finally James called the date off. Needless to say we're babysitting our babysitter til her parents get home because she can't get into their house and no one is home. Oh and she doesn't know her Mom's cell phone number. Note to self teach my kids my cell phone number before they turn 12.

At first I was upset.  I wanted a date, I got the babysitter, I did all the work and now it's not going to happen.  It was a little disappointing.  Then I was frustrated, I figured I'd drop off the babysitter and our night would be like any other night, but that didn't work out.  I felt like crying, but crying over spilled milk is pointless so I started to internalize our situation.  

I told myself all is good.  And then I started to believe it.  I knew it was best that we stayed home with Grace she's a tender spirit that Grace and she needs to know she is safe. It's my job as her parent to make sure she feels safe even if that mean no date nights. On the bright side both girls will be in bed soon and James and I can have some snuggle time at home. 

So once I came to the conclusion that it was okay that we stayed home I started to feel bad for the babysitter.  It was obviously very disappointing for her.  She came into the night with excitement and optimism.  She even had her babysitting bag of goodies.  One look at Grace and she shut down.  She wasn't sure what to do or how to handle the situation.  Poor thing.  And I didn't feel comfortable leaving her with a crying child when she felt so out of place.  Staying home was the right thing to do.  

Sarah Day said it perfectly "I think you showed her an excellent example of caring parents, I'm sure she learned more about parenting tonight than she will in all her future years babysitting. Maybe she was very nervous and grace picked up on it, children are so perceptive. Be glad you are that memory!

That's when i realized I wanted to keep this memory.  I wanted to Grace to know that we love her.  That her feeling of safety is important to us and that i could be proud of this difficult situation.

Family Photos

It was freezing and we had a wardrobe meltdown moments before our photo session but it was all worth it.

I love my family

Happy to be together Forever

Thank you Jason Box for your amazing work 

Gum transplants, and extra Papa time

I had a gum tissue transplant on Monday and James wanted to take a few days off work to help around the house and make sure I rested. It was so nice to have him around.  I was able to sleep whenever I needed and take my time to recover.  I have the best husband and I'm so grateful he works for a wonderful company that supports his commitments to his family.

With that said we had an extra long weekend and way to much fun.  We (mostly James) got the kids bedroom setup, butchered our first rabbit, stacked wood, prepped the garden for winter, went to the Museum of Glass, help Gwenevere with her school work and enjoyed many nights cuddling by the fireplace watching movies as a family and as a couple.

The MOG has a great program where they take kids drawings and make them into works of art.  Gwenevere and Grace wanted to submit their drawings.  

Thanks Gwenevere for being our family photographer so I can be in a few pictures too

Everett's bedroom and other Everett adventures. Mama help needed.

We finally put a bed in Everett's bedroom.  He's been sleeping in his room for 5 days now and he loves it.  James and I love the extra room in our bed too.

Everett's not the only one excited for his new bed.  Both girls really wanted to sleep with Everett in his new bed.  After Grace and Everett where both asleep Gwenevere came out of her bed and with excitement and frustration said "For once in my life,will you please let me sleep with Everett?"  LOL  So Everett's first night in his bed was shared with his big sister Gwenevere.  I was a bit nervous to see how the night would go, so around midnight I peeked into Everett's room.  Everett was wiggling and at the very moment Gwenevere sat up and pushed Everett and in her sleep said "Will you be quite?"  Oh dear,  I moved Gwenevere across the bed and then tucked Everett back to sleep.

Everett started walking on November 17th and took his first 5 steps unassisted while I was recovering from my surgery.  Sad I missed it but Thanks to Papa we have a video.  Awe he makes my heart happy.  He knows what just makes me happy.

Everett has two of his bottom teeth.  But that's it so far.  

Two more days til Everett is 14th months old.  I love the fact they grow up.  It's so fun to watch.  

Oh and did I mention this boys loves markers.  He is a hidden marker magnet and can find a marker anywhere he goes.  The poor kid has pen marks on his legs from two weeks ago.  LOL He loves to draw and I finally figured it out.  He's really getting into coloring with his big sisters.

Everett's artwork

Everett has pushed my parenting buttons lately and I'm not sure how to parent my wild beast.  He's defiantly adventurous and fearless.  Everett loves pulling off all the booking on the bookshelf, dumping out all the toys and turning the toy bins into ladders, climbing up on furniture and screaming with delight.  You'd think I wasn't used to having kids around with how frassiled I've been lately.  I've had good momentum keeping up on the house chores but with Everett's new habits I'm going around the house like a crazy lady picking up the same mess three or four times a day.  ugggg.

Did I really do this stage two times before?  I just have to keep reminding myself this is just a stage.  But if you have any fun advice about raising boys I would love some heart warming encouragement.  This mama is weak sauce.

With all that said, I can't imagine my world without him.  I love this little man to peaces and if my house looks like a tornato came through it, just know I'm busy watching my kids grow up to pay attention to cleaning details.  My BIG goal is to raise my kids in love and righteousness and hopefully someday cleanliness but I'm very much a work in process kind of mom.

Charlie's Birthday

To go or not to go?  We planned a trip to go Portland for Charlie's birthday and to take family photos, but feeling very overwhelmed I decided to cancel the trip.  It was a sad decision since I love visiting family.  Portland trips are so fun, but also very stressful sense we have so much family we want to see and limited time each trip.  I hate making the decisions on who to see and who to skip.  Sometimes it's easier not to go at all.

So on Wednesday morning I woke up and thought to myself, what are we doing here in Tacoma it's Charlie's birthday.  I called up James and told him of my wonderful idea of taking the kids to Portland.  He thought about it and called me back a few minutes later and said why not.  So I called up Rebecca and shared my idea with her.  She was excited we'd be coming and wasn't disapointment we interupted their birthday plans.  Rebecca was going to go on a mommy son date to the swimming pool, instead she invited Grandma Sharolee and we took the whole gang.

Grandma Thomas comes to visit

We had our primary program on Sunday so Grandma Thomas came to see it.  Lucky for us Preston and Taylor's primary program was on the same day so Grandma got to see both.  Grandpa Thomas wasn't up for the flight and long travel days so he kissed Grandma goodbye and sent her on her way bringing gifts of Hot Chocolate sent with love by Grandpa.

Grandma flew in Friday night.  Saturday morning we took her to ballet, the Farmers Market, and a local toy store.

At ballet

So much fluffiness  

We made it home to unpack change and then go again.  This time we went out to eat lunch at McDonald's and shop at Wal-Mart.  Then home to eat a yummy clam chowder made my James.

Sunday was a busy day with two primary programs. But we got to spend the evening with Will and Jenni.  It was wonderful.  

Monday I drove my mom back to the airport, but thankful to know we'll be seeing each other again right after Christmas.  

Random Happiness

This is what I get when I let my children play with my camera day after day.  Life is good

Gwenevere and Grace playing Noah's ark

We see this scene several times a day, I never thought of capturing this memory.

Mommy's break time to check my phone and proof that I had it earlier today.  Now if only I could find where I put it. 

Home schooled on the kitchen table in pjs 

Grace does Gwenevere's "boring work"

Grace's prize from the independent toy store celebration

Frosting gingerbread houses for the letter H 

I love how artizy this girl is becoming.

Local library coloring

Gwenevere with the camera again taking pictures of her little sister

"Now pose like this."  says the photographer 

90% sure this picture was taken by Grace

this picture made me happy

Grace's view of her room

Some of Gwenevere's favorite things in her room

Snowflake from Grandma Sharolee

Lately the kids have been playing surfer girls, I love how the play so well together.